Sometimes I wonder if I will live to be elder

As I lay awake in my comfort shelter.

Sometimes I wonder if I am enough,

To get through this complicated stuff.

At times I feel doubt as life slips through my fingers,

I hang to the moment as it lingers.

I try to sing and try to feel joy,

But life plays on like a childrens’ toy.

I stare at you as a child with wonder,

And I ponder if I will drag you asunder.

I sing and I pray and I cry and I carry on,

Wondering if we are singing the same song.

The one where we feel each others embrace, and times 

When I could read every look upon your face. 

Your breath moves your chest and I wonder what’s inside,

What’s going on, and is it too late to try.

But the truth is it’s never to late-

To hang on to what you love and embrace your fate.

Your eyes whisper queitly in the dark,

Of a world that I crave to be a part.

But you love me. My insanity. My mind.

Your eyes look upon me so soft and so kind.

You’re quiet but your loud with your care.

There isn’t a moment where I wonder if you’ll be there.

You fight for me when I am too weak.

When I am at my lowest you carry me to the peak.

You do so without return. Without asking and with so much concern.

You shelter me in your love and you push me to be stronger.

If it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t be here any longer.

You hold me up when I’m to weak to speak- to utter another phrase, you love me in spite of these harder days.

Even when I walk the hardest path, you save me everyday from the worlds wrath.

What you need to see as I do now 

Is your more than enough even if you don’t know how.

You make me feel safe in a world out for itself,

And you never make me feel lower on your shelf.

You do so fearlessly and with love in your heart,

You never run from the fight, and you’ve done that from the start. 

You’ll be here til the end and I realize that now,

We will make it through though we are not sure quite how. Hands held tightly, breathe in and out,

This is love- what it’s all about.

It’s not the toothpaste or toilett papar roll,

It’s more than your typical mold. 

You are my life and my choice and I will never look back,

You’re in my head, my body, and in my stack.

You’re here even though you have a choice to walk away.

That means more than words can say.

If I could have you a second time I’d do everything the same- just to have the last words on my lips as your name.

You hold me tight and I cry in fright. 

You tell me it’s ok and I believe you anyway.

You’ve made this life one I never want to leave. I need nothing else- I need no repreive. You’re here and I see everyday you are with me.

If all else fails beyond our bodies in ill repair- just know I’m still me and I’m always right there.